Bread and Wine

Recently I met my boyfriend for the first time. Say what? Yes you heard me right. I met my boyfriend for the first time when he stepped off of the airplane and into the Ohio humidity. Nervous jittery feelings were deeply imbedded into my person as the moment I had be waiting for and almost believing was not reality became reality.

Not more than 24 hours after we met in person for the first time we were thrown into a five day church conference complete with 2,000 people (exact number unknown). To say the pressure was on and the nerves were at an all time high is a vast understatement. I’ll pause here to say I wouldn’t have changed a single moment but it was far more overwhelming than I could have wrapped my head around.

This blog post isn’t about my Mark and I. Sorry to disappoint you but I sure do hope you’ll continue to read along as I share something very special to me.

Monday night at my churches conference we all go up on stage to sing. The singing comes after a special sermon directed at our young folks. Mark and I walked in to the song Would You be Poured Out Like Wine. The words gripped my heart as I heard it through his heart. For me it’s a fairly common song and I hear it a lot. For him it was the first time and I’m glad he had the thought to record it. As I reflected over our week together being surrounded by my fellowship I couldn’t help but have the light bulb moment of understanding that this fellowship had truly been poured out like wine and broken not only for each other but for Mark and I personally.

The week leading up to this unprecedented meeting I started getting texts of prayers and support. The day before a dear sister stopped by and as the Holy Spirit prompted took my hands and prayed for mark and I. All throughout the conference and even still phone calls,texts,and so very many prayers are being poured out like wine on our behalf. It’s not uncommon for me to value and be filled up with love by “my people”. In fact in every season I have had brothers and sisters walk along side me as consistent cheerleaders ready to support me however God leads. Poured..so much poured on my behalf.

Then there were the sermons prepared by God using willing men as humble vessels for His glory. Oh so incredibly rich were the moments sitting in fellowship ears attentive and hearts connecting. After each preaching service I was so in awe of all the people who came up and talked to Mark and I. They treated us like fellow citizens of the kingdom and not simply the next article of gossip in the newspaper. Ministers,friends,strangers,everywhere everyone was available to talk about the Lord. My friends from all spots in life shared meals with us. These selfless acts of making the person I care about feel welcome was not overlooked but in fact was noticed and brought tears to my eyes! My fellowship was broken like bread to feed the hungry! Oh we are hungry for your continued prayers over this relationship.

Next up was Tuesday council meeting which I honestly didn’t really know what to think about as we walked in. Soon I knew without a doubt that these men laboring for this little part of the body of Christ were communicating in love and I was glad Mark got to experience that. Before Tuesday’s council there was Sunday’s communion. It’s nothing for communion to be a moving time of pure worship. I personally felt overwhelmed by that point. Overwhelmed in a good way but there was a lot of pressure on us having just met and now everyone being so excited and ready for us to tie the knot in their minds. I sat at the table just sobbing realizing that there was no way that I could do this relationship on my own but rather I needed Jesus take the complete lead as we have desired from the beginning. No amount of well wishes or personal hopes could carry us, only the Holy Spirit has that capability. So after taking the wine and the bread I felt peace so much peace knowing no matter my tomorrows He has already paved the way. He has provided me with a loving fellowship that is the embodiment of the song we sang and the Jesus we serve.

I don’t know where you find yourself on this pilgrim journey. Maybe you’re not yet a pilgrim and find yourself just plum lost. That’s not how this life is supposed to be. The kingdom of God is a community made up of living people living in abundant joy serving their king Jesus. That manifests itself in many ways such as laying down your life for a brother or sister as my fellowship has done for me. If you haven’t yet started your pilgrimage I ask “why not”? Why haven’t you surrendered your will to the Lord? Are you going through life looking the part but living in the depths of depression or lukewarm living..or maybe you’re just spiritually dead? Know this one thing. We have all come short of the glory of God. We are rotten with sin and deserve to die. God doesn’t accept dead people into His spotless kingdom. You must take hold of what the Word says in John 3:16. For God so loved the world (you&me) that He gave His only begotten son so that whosoever shall parish will have everlasting life! He wants to take you from death into life,darkness into light! Then only then you can follow the Words of Jesus in taking your cross (His cause) and follow after Him as pilgrims and strangers in this foreign land.

To the pilgrim that’s just journeying on. Don’t be disheartened in well doing. Your labor is not in vain. Like the fellowship that I’ve been placed in, be an blessing and an encouragement to those that you meet. I once was lost sinking in sin but if it weren’t for pilgrims willing to step out in faith along the way to walk along side me at a slower pace, I may never have found real healing and surrender! Chin up dear ones! You’re doing a good work! Continue to be Poured out like wine and broken like bread in the name of of sweet Jesus Christ!

Much love, Pilgrim Nicci

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Snippet:Don’t Be Content With Darkness

There is light and there is darkness. Contrary to popular belief you won’t find a middle ground between the two. It doesn’t matter if you went into the water and came out sopping wet. This thing called church membership and community living has absolutely no value without the Holy Spirit causing the old man to be laid off and new life to spring forward.

Which side do you find yourself on? Do you sit in darkness but look nice on the outside,content to look nice and catch a few of the church life benefits? Or rather do you live a fulfilled life in the kingdom reflecting the light,life,and love of the Lord Jesus Christ?

Do not be pleased to be hypocrites. The world will call the pretender’s bluff and rightfully so. The truth will be found and judgment will come when the bridegroom comes for His perfect bride spotless without blemish or wrinkle. He will not be content with an unlit soul insiders a dead body.

Pesto Please

Knock knock are you all still there?

After what seems like an eternity since I last wrote anything just purely for the joy of writing, I’m here to share something a little new to the blog. Now before I begin please don’t get your hopes up to much that this is my “new thing”. Inspiration hit as I sunk my teeth into a tantalizing chunk of “pizza” on Monday. Sure I had created it and yeah it smelled heavenly but you never can tell until you yourself just dig right in!

Now I’m not one to brag…ok, stop laughing! Ok, I AM one to brag and this pesto chicken pizza bread was A++ and I just couldn’t deprive my faithful followers from the tingling tastebuds that could await them.

Now dear ones I must say that before you get too emotionally involved with this concoction of fine degree, you must note a few things. No,I’m not anyone fancy therefore I don’t cook fancy. Let’s face it. I’m just a single gal(well not really but maybe that’s a post for a different time) cooking just for myself. Yes, it’s simple and perhaps you already have this in your arsenal of delectable delights. Lastly, I don’t measure when I’m creating so if you aren’t a roll with the punches kind of a gem, you may want to exit now. However IF you have scope for the imagination and are looking for something to shove in your face. I’ve got the “recipe” for you!

Pesto chicken pizza bread

Ingredients:

(as I remember them but hey feel free to add what ya want. Cooking is your moment to shine!)

-Butter:some

-Parmesan:a whole bunch

-Milk/half half/cream cheese:eh maybe like 1/4-1/2 cup?

-Salt/pepper: pinch but be careful on the salt. The pesto adds some saltiness and so does the parm.

-Cooked chicken finely diced(grab a big knife and recreate Julia Child and the onion scene in Julie and Julia)

-Pesto: Homemade is best but a small store bought container is good too.

-pizza cheese: I’ll give you the freedom of choice here.

-Crusty bread:

-Fresh mozzarella: Don’t cheat yourself here.

To begin our saga, the butter must first change its matter from a solid to a liquid, for those scratching their heads,melt the butter! Once the butter has made it’s transformation add the parm,you’ll want to lower the heat and begin stirring the cheese and butter. Add the milk or half/half of cream cheese (only a little cream cheese) and stir like your life depends on it. Once you’ve got a saucy looking liquid. Take it off the heat and set aside.

Next…are you still following me? Chop your cooked chicken,place it in a bowl along with the pizza cheese,some parm,and pesto. Toss that around a bit(I personally like to pretend I’m tossing a salad because let’s be real, it’s as close as I get to eating something green).

Set that bowl aside and grab the bread. Cut the bread in half. Begin scooping all the fluffiness right outta there. I am an excellent pretender and I imagined all of the *calories being ripped out! *Please note that no calories were harmed in the making of this pizza. You take full responsibility for the consumption of this recipe. Once it now resembles a bowl like boat pour some of the sauce into the carved out bread bowl. Spread it around like a normal boring pizza. After that, fill it up with the chicken mixture. I pressed it down a bit to pack the optimal amount of chicken into it. Grab your fresh mozzarella and slice it to put on top!

Now here’s the tough part. Do you want to freeze it for a later date or heat that baby up and go to town? Freezer option just grab a freezer baggy and let it do its thing. If you opt to eat it right away I’d suggest placing right on the oven rack. Bake at 350 until the mozzarella is getting golden brown!

Well folks I certainly hope you’ll enjoy this as much as I did! If you do end up trying it out, I’d love to hear from you! Pictures of the finished product would be awesome too!

As always much love,

PilgrimNicci

Ps. Here’s a picture to prove I’m still amongst the living!

Time Well Traveled

Here we find ourselves at the end of another year. With God’s abundant grace we have will be given a new year with multiple opportunities. I know for myself this year has been a year of change,growth,and exciting new doors that have opened and some that have closed. I’m not unique in reflecting on the year that has passed. Many blog posts and conversations will be focused on this passage of time. I’d like join in and reflect on the awesomeness of my God in His love and care for me in this past year.

Moody Clouds!

January: I found myself preparing for my newest roommate to move in. Having the privilege to live and work along side Roxy was a joy and blessing.

February: I discovered that although for many many years I valued St. Patrick’s Day as my favorite holiday it actually turns out to be Valentines Day. I wear pink,bought a heart shaped pizza,and my parents sent me beautiful flowers. What more could a woman ask for?!? Alongside my new found favorite holiday, I celebrate in my heart the day I fully came into submission and surrender to my Lord! It fills me with all sorts of large feelings I will never be able to put into words. My life removed from God is worth nothing. That is cause enough to praise His name! https://pilgrimnicci.wordpress.com/2018/02/07/they-call-me-a-fool-he-calls-me-his-bride/

March: This month was filled with birthday type stuff. I turned 27 and started a new year of life.

April: I boarded a small six passenger airline and headed with a team to Florida to serve at a family healing camp. My heart grew like the Grinches heart grew while I spent time with children and families effected by RAD(Reactivate Attachment Disorder). I would never of called myself a “kid person” sure I love teaching and such but something changed in seeing parents literally fighting for the lives of their children. We are called to care for the widows and children and I can do that by supporting these awesome families that are growing little hearts that have been hurt.

May: The end of a challenging school year ended and honestly I was so thankful! A much needed break was in the horizon. https://pilgrimnicci.wordpress.com/2018/05/14/seek-ye-first-the-kingdom-of-god-not-the-amish-romance/

June: Annual meeting was a delight because I got to connect with many of my brothers and sisters in Christ. There is a vision that takes place in my mind when we are gathered around the communion table seeking to do the will of God. We are each humbly waiting for that day that we are one in the consummation of the marriage with Christ!

After annual meeting I packed my bags for a week of Training/working in Canada with a raddlet (kid with RAD). Whew no amount of time would allow me to tell all of the stories. Fear,excitement,drama,smells,and friendship blooming we’re all words I’d use. Originally I was planning on heading to Georgia for about a month but the child needed different care so I headed home with a switch of plans.

https://pilgrimnicci.wordpress.com/2018/06/16/passport-prayer/

July: This was the most boring,lonely,horrible month ever. On the tail of the disappointment of lost opportunity I was in the house completely alone for a good portion with absolutely nothing to do and no motivation to find something to fill my time. I’m not proud of July but God uses it to draw me closer to Him. I had a lot of one on one talks with Him and my Bible was opened on my lap more than it wasn’t. I found comfort in bringing my Bible to bed with me each night as if a security blanket.

https://pilgrimnicci.wordpress.com/2018/06/22/diary-post-a-few-thoughts-on-boredom/

August: I went to Kansas for a weekend that I can honestly say was one of the best weekends of my life! I felt so loved by my friends Lana and Monica as they had carefully planned a to do list of fun for us. We did so much but beyond that we grew a little closer as friends. https://pilgrimnicci.wordpress.com/2018/08/12/find-me-in-the-woods-among-the-trees/

School started and instantly I could “feel” that it was going to be a good year. I have yet to be disappointed in how the cookies have crumbled.

https://pilgrimnicci.wordpress.com/2018/07/18/a-fresh-start-with-a-rainbow-of-opportunities/

Yes, I was terrified but it was worth it!

September: We (at school) really started to feel our routine set in and the normal school days began to flourish. I am very fortunate to get the opportunity to work among fellow followers of Jesus Christ as we labor for the kingdom of God! I started doing therapeutic respite in my home and I have been enjoying the process so much! It’s a unique challenge and requires me to be on my A game 100% but oh so worth giving these wonderful parents a small break from having to be the superhero for a few days. I pray that God gives me many more opportunities to support these awesome parents! https://pilgrimnicci.wordpress.com/2018/07/23/its-a-sloths-life-pajamaspity-partiesand-pee-peevpants/

October: My teeny tiny nephew came into the world with many prayers and much love. His arrival has been a highlight of the year for sure! Each new babe is a special miracle from God. Let’s hold our children a little closer this year as we realize some children never get to feel the love that yours does. Let’s pause to pray for the hearts of the neglected and abused children. Oh Lord you do care and hear their cries!

Sweet child

I got on an airplane for the third time this year for an adventure of a lifetime! Myself along with my brothers and sisters in Christ went to Germany to meet up with more of our family in Christ to support and have a love feast in their neck of the woods! Oh what a joy filled experience unmatched by anything I’ve ever been a part of before. This was the moment I got what I really was a part of. My fellowship is my everything here on earth to me.

https://pilgrimnicci.wordpress.com/2018/10/17/spaghetti-loving-people-in-germany/

Brother and sister in Germany

November:This month was a fun one! Myself and three other women rented a cabin in the woods in Holmes County to find some R&R. We did all the usual things that you do there with the addition of spending a day doing fun crafty things! Somewhere along the way in the summer I took up painting. It’s a skill I hope to expand to bless others as I write letters that will bring encouragement to those that get them.

https://pilgrimnicci.wordpress.com/2018/08/27/handwritten-letter-a-lost-art-or-not-needed-anymore/

December: December=eventful!

My friend Lana came out for the weekend so we could…well let’s just say check your mailbox in the next week. We had more laughs than I knew could happen! Friends sure make life fun!

I had the opportunity to be perused by a godly man in another fellowship. It was a fun opportunity that turned out to not bring peace even though it was fun while it lasted. Who doesn’t want to be valued by someone here on earth? It was a growing experience bringing me to face my vision for my life and how God has continued to call me to be faithful in all things.

I am traveling home now after a week in Missouri and Kansas. Things like Christmas,sickness,Cheesecake Factory,bonding,and large sloths are the words used for this trip.

Now we find ourselves back at January where I began a year ago. I can’t tell you what the next year will hold but my prayer is go a steadfast commitment to my Lord and Savior as I continue on my pilgrimage in the kingdom of God. I hope I meet many new friends and strengthen relationships with the ones I already have. This year has brought many Mountain View moments and yes, a few moments where I stood at the bottom of the mountain wondering why I had to start again. I can say without any stretching of the truth that the climb was worth it!

The sun rose and set every day of this past year and I got to enjoy most of them as I did life. Oh the gift that is a new day! Let us each wake to look for the gift God has given us then let us fall before Him in praise!

I love you all! Much love dear ones. If you haven’t found yourself at the foot of the cross casting your sins away, I urge you to cry out to our sovereign Lord to help you to do so! This life here on earth will vanish and we will each face eternity. I want you each to face it looking at the face of Jesus at the wedding of His people with Him to never be separated. If I can help you by answering questions or praying along side of you please let me know. We are not promised another day on this earth. Make your choice now. https://pilgrimnicci.wordpress.com/2018/07/13/why-i-deserve-to-go-to-hell-but-i-wont/

Pilgrim Nicci

Diary Post:God Loves You Even When You Can’t See Clearly

Do you pray for the lost in the world?

Today as I was driving home from the school I was feeling really restless. The powerful feeling of needing to talk to my Father was apparent but I didn’t really have anything to say. Maybe from reading other posts of mine you might get the impression that I never have anything to say to my Father. That is the furthest thing from the truth. In reality I am in a continual conversation with Him throughout the day. It’s the times that I’m wrestling with something and it’s no different than going to your earthly dad and asking for advice. Sometimes you just don’t know how to start the conversation.

As I was trying to start my conversation ( which in reality is silly because He already knows my heart) I was rethinking the phone call I got back from an anabaptist organization in China. That conversation kept the light in my Spirit fueled and added hope to my that maybe just maybe God could use me in China. But I found myself asking how? It’s just not even possible! I don’t have money or bravery. Humph!

So there I was driving along looking for my voice and it came! Oh how I was pouring my heart to my Father. Something in my Spirit kept saying “Nicci you need to repent for getting ahead of God”. What seriously? How have I done that? I’ve tried to follow His will. I’ve tried to accept situations that I don’t understand and reconcile the sadness I feel for lost opportunity. Now you want me to repent for something I’m not even sure I did?

With shaky voice I said “Lord I don’t know what I did wrong. My heart is here for you to lead. That’s all I ever wanted. I never meant to go ahead of your will for my life. However Father I repent of my sinful human nature. I take responsibility Father for anything I did to get in the way of your plan for my life or others. You know what is best in every situation. I do not and I have no place to desire anything that you have not first authorized. Lord God draw me closer to you so I might know your will. Help me see it crystal clear. Don’t let me muddy the picture with myself. Create in me an honest person. Take away myself and my pride or whatever stand in the way of clear vision.

In the middle of my prayer I got a phone call from a person that is a friend but is totally on a different social stage than me. It’s always a little shocking getting a call from them because I think “Why in the world would they want to talk to me? They have tons of friends.” I know that those feelings are wrong and this person is human and probably has those same feelings too. Anyway the call was literally just to ask me how I was doing and if I was excited for the upcoming school year. I thought wow how sweet of this person to call to ask that! Then they went on to say something like “Now I don’t mean this in anyway but encouraging but I keep wondering if you getting into RAD is God’s way of providing you children because you may never have any”. Then the person went on to share a heartwarming story about an ant and a contact lens that absolutely touched my soul!

The phone call ended and I sang praises to the Lord for Him providing a diverse group of friends. They may not be all best friends but friends all the same!

When I got home I checked my Facebook (surprise)and I saw I had a message from someone. Hmm who is this? Oh I know! It was the lady I sat next to at church yesterday. I had felt so awkward because I sat too far up and was literally sitting with all ministers wives. Now of course it really wasn’t a big deal I didn’t do it on purpose and I REALLY didn’t want to sit in the back with the young folks so I had a choice to make..and I made it. Anyway she was a dear! I greatly enjoyed chatting with her after church. In the message she sent on Facebook it said “Remember that you don’t have to do anything to be loved by God…He already loves you because you’re you.

I’ll tell you what! That reached deep into my heart and gave it a squeeze ! Here on the way home I was feeling like a failure because I don’t see God’s plan clearly right now. Then I got a call from a friend that I don’t feel like measure up to socially but it turned out so encouraging. I had to repent for feeling less. Then this message came to assure me of the Father’s love! You just never know the impact of a simple phone call or message will have on someone’s life. I went downstairs to tell the lady I live with and I could hardly stop crying happy tears to tell her my joy! This is the point you probably also think I sit around and cry all of the time. Well not all of the time but I am an incredibly emotional person and I feel ALL of the feels in life. So yes I do cry a lot…and I’m ok with that.

I’m curious,how has God shown Himself to you today?

Yes, my God loves imperfect me!

Why I Deserve to Go to Hell but I Won’t

Are people generally good? Do people do the best that they can? I believe if you were to ask random people on the street they would say yes. I say no. Here is why. Genesis 3:6-13 depicts the fall of man and his response. Those of us that label ourselves affectionately Christians know the story like the back our hand. I’m not saying humans are not generally good because Adam and Eve fell,all though that is part of it. I would argue that it’s because of their response to that fall. Let’s take a slightly deeper look. They ate of the tree off knowledge of good and evil and their eyes were opened to their nakedness. Now here was their opportunity to fall before God and beg of His mercy but that’s not the choice they made. Instead in attempt to hide themselves they sewed fig leaves together. When God confronted them yet again there was the perfect opportunity to throw their hands up and confess their sins. Did they? No, Adam turned the blame from himself to not only Eve but God who created Eve. Oh dear Adam would you have played your cards differently if you would have known the ramifications of your actions? In my heart I would like to think so but I know better.

How do I know what Adam and Eve would of done if they knew the consequences? Simply put, I’ve been Adam and Eve before. I know the tragedy of realizing my sin even though I may have not known that I was sinning. I know the reality of choosing to sin willingly. I even know the pit in the stomach feeling of trying to cover up my sin. I know all to well that humans, specifically Nicci is not good.

Let me share a little bit of the reality of my sin with you. Now if you ask my mom or maybe even people that have known me fa while they may not know my inner heart or the depth of my sinful nature. I am not sharing this to make myself look bad or to bring glory to the person that I once was. I desperately want to call sin what it is and to share that there is redemption available. So let’s pick up when I was thirteen going on fourteen and then the early months of fifteen. I’d say I was the average middle school student. I was pretty innocent and I loved my parents. I was really excited to be going to a new school and moving to a new area,one close to my then best friend! The only thing not so normal about me was that my family was essentially homeless. We lived in a motel and would off and on for a long time. In some ways it was like an adventure and others it was drove me to try to fit in or to be as “good” as my peers.

Soon enough school was in full swing and I was making more friends. One day I got a note from my best friend that was from the guy we dubbed “the curly headed kid”. I didn’t know him but my friend and I would watch him and his mass amount of curly hair get on and off of the school bus each day. In this note was an invitation of sorts to our school dance. To say I was elated would be an understatement. I remember that night as if it happened yesterday. It was so fun and was nearly movie perfect. I could almost imagine the cast of high school musical break out in song at any moment. Yes, it is a fun and thrilling memory. Needless to say as time went on our relationship grew (as much as it can at age 13/14. I mean come on.) and we didn’t remain pure. Despite the fact him and his mom attended Church every Sunday and my mom would drop me off too. I had a desire to follow Jesus but had no clue how to do that. We were fairly active at that little local Methodist church. Unfortunately because of our impure relationship we often times were lying to our parents and that made me feel worse than the after effects of the sexual relationship did. I’d walk home knowing what I was engaging in was wrong. Slowly my time spent with this guy turned from fun or at the very least what I thought was normal to heartache and despair. We’d go to the local Dollar General and he’d steal stuff and I knew it. He’d get more rough with me and I’d start finding bruises on my body that happened while he was “teasing”. All these too big of emotions coupled with my teenaged hormones being out of wack caused me to cut…well what ever you call using a sharpened stick to harm yourself. I had no real desire to hurt myself but I knew tons of other girls did it and I read in my teen books of the angsty characters did it,so why shouldn’t I try? I felt sad and my boyfriend was no longer hurting me in private but now in public too! It all came crashing down one day when he kicked me into the other seat as I was getting off the bus. I retaliated and punched him back and called him a filthy name. The cops were called and of course I was the one to get reprimanded. The bus driver didn’t see what he had done only the punch I threw. Unfortunately I had deleted all of his possessive and hate texts because I was terrified of my mom seeing them. My whole life was one big mess and not a lot of people knew about it. I was dressing the part of a over sexualized teenager during the week and going to church on Sunday. My sin was monstrous and I deserved to go to hell.

“Sexy” expressions are what is displayed on nearly all of my pictures from that time

What we wear does change our actions

I’ve never typed that nor have I shared all the details of that time in my life. I suppose my mother knows more than most and I’m glad through it all she stood by my side.

So how does a filthy beaten down sinner escape hell? How does a person even begin to wash their dirty laundry in their past baggage? How do they lay their baggage down and walk away from it forever? Simply put,YOU don’t. Magnificently though God does! So although you,me,and lots of other nasty sinners have rotting past and there is no escape there is a savior! John 3:16 says For God so love the world (you/me) that He sent His only begotten son so that whosoever believes in Him shall not perish ( go to hell) but have everlasting life! Isn’t that absolutely amazing news? Doesn’t that make you want to leap for joy? It does me. So Jesus in His time here in earth detailed how a person can inherit eternal life through His life,death,and resurrection. His overarching message was that the kingdom of God is at hand. He showed us very clearly that being in a relationship with Him was so much more than get out of hell free card. It had some requirements and some duties that we must fulfill. You know because after all we are not naturally good. We desperately needed Him to spell things out for us. You see once Jesus’s blood cleans a person all up and the Holy Spirit comes to make it’s abode in us the requirements of kingdom life really are not a burden. They are in fact a joy to carry out. Now I’m not going to lie and say they are easy because sometimes simple stuff like loving my neighbor is hard. That’s where His grace comes in. We won’t ever be perfect and we will have a free will and Jesus knows that. Through our repentance and patterning our lives after His, we will become His disciple. Day by day the gap between you and your past will grow so vast that it’s not possible to cross it to the person that you once were. That in my opinion is where the assurance of salvation is apparent. You no longer see yourself how Satan wanted you to be but rather how God see you! Trust me when I say that Satan will tell you that you are worthless and trash. That you will never be far away from the label of your sin. I’m here to tell you that yes sin is absolutely unacceptable in the eyes of God. It does make you wrenched and nasty. However the relationship you enter into as a baby Christian and journey through into disciple is a purifying process and NO ONE can stake their claim to your life except Jesus Christ!

This is the real me. The me that has JOY!

No,people are not good;but Jesus Christ is!

Much love,

Pilgrim Nicci

Distorted View is Made by You

When we choose to do things our own way over the way of the Lord it is a sin against Him and a curse unto ourselves. We cannot see the whole picture. Our way is the fuzzy way,and I don’t mean warm fuzzy, I mean distorted.

Sometimes we see things the way we want to see them. It becomes easy to block out the rest of the image as we try to focus more clearly on the path we wish to pave for ourselves. It even can look beautiful for a time. It becomes a non issue to justify sin. Drifting away from God we feel can be explained away by cutesy sentiments like:

-“All those that wander are not lost.”

-“I have an insane feeling to be where I am not.”

-“Be gentle with yourself you’re doing the best you can.”

-“Overthinking will destroy your mood.Breath and let go.”

-“Sometimes God calls us to something different than everyone else.”<=this one can be true but He will NEVER call you out of His law or will.

Do these sound familiar? They blanket the inspirational quote section of Pinterest. You can also find them on a mass amount of wall hangings,T-shirts,notebooks,and other in demand items.

God will NEVER call you out of His will. He will NEVER direct you to sin. He WILL let you choose out of free will. He WILL allow temptation and trials to take place.

With our distorted view,as we are drifting away from God in our own direction, we Inevitably will show up on Satan’s doorstep. We will have some past knowledge and even maybe some sincere desire to do what is right. Unfortunately our fuzzy and distorted frame of reference will have us doing things all wrong. There will be no obedience to God and all honor will go to Satan.

You see God has a perfect way for us to follow. He sent Jesus to pave the way and pattern for our lives. The Holy Spirit was left with us when Jesus could no longer be here on earth. There is no real reason that we should get lost while on the pilgrimage we must take. The plan was made,the guide is ready,all we must do is follow. Yup but good ol’ self gets in the way! We must ask ourselves, ” What is worth going away from God’s perfect will and what is the cost”?

The answer to those questions are straightforward. Nothing is worth going against God’s perfect will and perfect plan. The cost is the high price of enteral damnation. A separateness from the one who created us and loves us with a never changing love.

So I don’t know about you but for me the obvious answer is to do things God’s way even when I think something would be easier or more fun if I could reroute the plan. In the end there is great joy in serving the Lord His way! Even better is that the picture will become clearer and more beautiful as you take the steps that Jesus took. The the journey may get weary and is isn’t always the easy road but with a clear view you will find a place of rest.

This blog post was based off of these scriptures. I’d appreciate your thoughts as you read and pray over these words. I don’t claim to understand them 100% but this is what the Holy Spirit placed on my heart as I prayed and asked for wisdom.

Much love,

Pilgrim Nicci

Isaiah 66:3-4

3 He that killeth an ox is as if he slew a man; he that sacrificeth a lamb, as if he cut off a dog’s neck; he that offereth an oblation, as if he offered swine’s blood; he that burneth incense, as if he blessed an idol. Yea, they have chosen their own ways, and their soul delighteth in their abominations.

4 I also will choose their delusions, and will bring their fears upon them; because when I called, none did answer; when I spake, they did not hear: but they did evil before mine eyes, and chose that in which I delighted not.